Q: How do crazy people go through the forest?
A: They take the psycho path.
Q: How do you get holy water?
A: Boil the hell out of it.
Q: What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall?
A: "Dam!"
Q: What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
A: Polaroids.
Q: What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?
A:A stick.
Q: What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
A:Nacho Cheese.
Q: What do you call Santa's helpers?
A:Subordinate Clauses.
Q: What do you call four bullfighters in quicksand?
A:Quatro sinko.
Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?
A:Spoiled milk.
Q: What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
A: Frostbite.
Q: What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A: A nervous wreck.
Q: What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A: Anyone can roast beef.
Q: Where do you find a dog with no legs?
A: Right where you left him.
Q: Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
A: Because they have big fingers
Q: Why don't blind people like to sky dive?
A: Because it scares the hell out of the dog.
Q: What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic?
A: Sanka.
Q: What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
A: The location of the dirt bag.
Q: Why does a pilgrim's pants always fall down?
A: Because they wear their belt buckle on their hat.
Q: What's the difference between a bad golfer and a bad skydiver?
A: A bad golfer goes, WHACK! "Damn."
A: A bad skydiver goes, "Damn." WHACK!
Q: What do you call a man with a car on his head?
A: Jack
Q: How do you catch a unique rabbit?
A: Unique up on it!
Q: How do you catch a tame rabbit?
A: Tame way!
Q: What do you call skydiving lawyers?
A: Skeet.
Q: What goes clop, clop, clop, bang, bang, clop clop clop?
A: An Amish drive-by shooting.
Q: How are a Texas tornado and a Tennessee divorce the same?
A: Somebody's gonna lose a trailer.